“The Art of Acting Fine: Are We All Just Faking Cool?”

Ever had one of those moments when a friend made a “joke,” but it hit you the wrong way?
Something like, “You’re always so slow,” or “That’s so typical of you.”
You smile it off, laugh a little, and say, “Haha, no worries.”
But later that night, you find yourself thinking about it over and over.
Was I really being slow? Did they mean that as a joke, or not?

Even though your feelings were hurt, expressing them felt… wrong.
So you just played it cool.
Because somehow, being cool has become a kind of social survival skill.

I started wondering—why is it so hard for us to say, “That actually bothered me” or “I didn’t feel great when you said that”?
Maybe it’s because we grew up hearing that crying is a sign of weakness,
or that showing anger means you’re emotionally unstable.
Somewhere along the way, we started believing that being emotionally neutral = being mature.

Take a look at social media, for example.
Saying “I’m exhausted lately” feels way more vulnerable than “Keeping it cool as always.”
So instead of sharing our struggles, we post aesthetic selfies and funny captions, and hide the messy stuff behind emoji filters.

But let’s be honest—pretending to be okay is exhausting.
It takes energy to smile when you don’t feel like it.
To say “it’s nothing” when your heart is still replaying the scene.
And after doing that for so long, you start to confuse pretending with feeling.
Am I actually fine? Or have I just been faking it too well for too long?

I sometimes wish we lived in a world where it was okay to say,
“That hurt my feelings,” without feeling awkward or weak.
Where being honest was seen as strong, not dramatic.
Where saying “I’m not okay right now” didn’t make people uncomfortable.

Why are we all trying so hard to be cool anyway?
What if being emotionally open, messy, and human was the new cool?

So tell me—
When was the last time you acted like you were fine... when you really weren’t?
And do you still remember how you truly felt underneath it all?

— Luda ✧